What Does The Bible Say About Crushes?

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A heart with wings

It’s challenging to be a believer, especially in a world where modern perspectives are constantly evolving and changing. One particular topic of interest among Christian youth is the concept of having a ‘crush.’ But what does the Bible say about crushes? This article delves into biblical perspectives on this common experience.

Understanding the Concept of Crushes

The first step in this discussion is understanding what we mean by a ‘crush.’ The concept of a crush isn’t directly mentioned in the Bible, but we can infer potential perspectives based on the Bible’s teachings on love, relationships, and self-control.

Often, the term ‘crush’ is used to indicate the initial stage of attraction between people—it’s an emotion fueled more by prospect and less by actual knowledge of the other person. It’s important to understand the psychological aspects of a crush to navigate these emotions properly in a Christian way.

When we experience a crush, it can be an exhilarating and confusing time. We may find ourselves daydreaming about the person, imagining what it would be like to be in a relationship with them. These thoughts can bring a sense of joy and excitement, as well as a tinge of nervousness and anticipation.

However, it’s crucial to remember that a crush is often based on superficial aspects or a perception of the individual rather than a deep connection or shared values. This infatuation-based attraction can be misleading, as we may be drawn to someone based on their physical appearance or certain qualities that catch our attention. It’s important to approach these feelings with caution and seek a deeper understanding of the person beyond the initial attraction.

Defining Crushes in a Modern Context

In a modern-day context, a crush can be seen as a primarily infatuation-based attraction towards someone, often based on superficial aspects or a perception of the individual rather than a deep connection or shared values. It is typically characterized by an intense fascination and desire for connection.

However, this modern experience must be understood and addressed through the lens of faith, with guidance and wisdom from scripture.

When we have a crush on someone, it’s important to remember that God calls us to love others unconditionally. This means that our feelings should not be solely based on physical attraction or surface-level qualities. Instead, we should strive to see the person as a whole, appreciating their character, values, and spiritual journey.

It’s also crucial to exercise self-control and not let our emotions dictate our actions. While it’s natural to feel excited and drawn to someone, we must be mindful of our thoughts and behaviors. It’s essential to treat the person with respect and honor their boundaries, even if our feelings are strong.

The Psychological Aspects of Crushes

Psychologically, crushes can stem from a cocktail of chemicals and neurons firing in our brains. It’s often associated with feelings of joy, excitement, anticipation, and even anxiety. These feelings, if left unchecked, can easily spiral out of control, leading to obsessive thinking, irrational behavior, and emotional dysfunction.

When we have a crush, our brain releases dopamine, which is often referred to as the “feel-good” chemical. This surge of dopamine can create a sense of euphoria and pleasure, making us crave more interactions with the person we’re attracted to. Additionally, our brain may also release norepinephrine, a hormone that increases our heart rate and can lead to feelings of excitement and nervousness.

This makes it essential to have a grounded, faith-based approach when dealing with these emotions. By seeking guidance from scripture and relying on God’s wisdom, we can navigate the complexities of a crush with grace and integrity.

It’s important to remember that a crush is just the beginning of a potential relationship. It’s a starting point that can lead to something deeper or may fade away over time. Regardless of the outcome, we should approach our feelings with humility, seeking God’s will and trusting in His plan for our lives.

Biblical Perspectives on Love and Attraction

As we grapple with the feelings that come with a crush, we must remember to apply a biblical lens to our situation. The concept of love is deeply embedded in Biblical teachings, but it differs significantly from the worldly understanding of love.

The following sections point to some of the Old Testament and New Testament views on love.

Old Testament Views on Love

In the Old Testament of the Bible, love is portrayed as an action, an act of unwavering loyalty, self-sacrifice, grace, and mercy.
For example, the love between Ruth and Naomi in the book of Ruth demonstrates a dedication that transcends duty or obligation. It’s a love rooted in choosing the other person’s wellbeing over one’s own desires or comfort.

Ruth, a Moabite woman, showed immense loyalty to her mother-in-law, Naomi, after the death of their husbands. Despite the cultural expectations and the challenges they faced, Ruth chose to stay with Naomi, forsaking her homeland and her own future prospects. This act of love and loyalty is a powerful example of the kind of love that the Old Testament teaches.

Another illustration of love in the Old Testament can be found in the story of David and Jonathan. Their friendship was built on a deep love and loyalty to one another. Jonathan, the son of King Saul, risked his own life to protect David from his father’s jealousy and anger. Their bond was so strong that Jonathan even gave up his potential claim to the throne in support of David. Their love was selfless and sacrificial, demonstrating the kind of love that God desires from His people.

Keeping these views in mind can help us align our emotions and actions towards others correctly. It reminds us that love is not just a feeling but a choice to put someone else’s needs above our own.

New Testament Teachings on Love

The New Testament further expands on the concept of love, notably through the teaching of Jesus Christ Himself. His teachings emphasize love as a commandment—loving God with all our heart, mind, soul, and strength and loving our neighbor as ourselves.

Jesus’ teachings on love challenge us to go beyond our natural inclinations and love others unconditionally. This includes loving those who may be difficult to love or who have wronged us. It requires us to extend forgiveness and grace, just as God has shown us.

In the context of a crush, this teaches us to control our emotions and ensure they do not lead us into sin or hinder our ability to love God or others fully. It reminds us that our feelings should be grounded in a genuine care and concern for the other person, rather than selfish desires or fantasies.

Furthermore, the New Testament also teaches about the love of God for humanity. It emphasizes that God’s love is unconditional and sacrificial. The ultimate demonstration of this love is seen in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Through His sacrifice, we are offered forgiveness and the opportunity to experience a deep and meaningful relationship with God.

Understanding God’s love for us can provide a solid foundation for how we approach love and attraction in our own lives. It reminds us that true love is not based on fleeting emotions or physical attraction alone but on a commitment to selflessness, loyalty, and the wellbeing of others.

What Does the Bible Say About Crushes?

Contrary to popular belief, the Bible can offer guidance on emotional topics like crushes, despite not explicitly addressing them.

The following sections will delve into a possible biblical interpretation of crushes and even highlight relevant Bible verses.

Biblical Interpretations of Crushes

In interpreting crushes, we can look to the Bible’s teachings on lust, temptation, attraction, and love. While the Bible doesn’t specifically speak about crushes, it provides plenty of guidance on how to deal with similar feelings and situations in a God-honouring manner.

The Bible cautions against lust and temptation, urging us to maintain pure hearts and minds. In the context of crushes, this means recognising when feelings are becoming too intense or crossing boundaries and taking steps to realign with Biblical teachings.

Bible Verses Related to Crushes

Bible verses such as Proverbs 4:23, ‘Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life’, and Romans 12:2, ‘Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind’, can be very instructive for Christians dealing with crushes.

These verses remind us to not be led astray by our feelings, but to seek wisdom in the word of God and let it guide our reactions and decisions.

Managing Crushes in a Christian Way

So, how should a Christian manage a crush? It’s critical to balance these feelings with your faith, using the teachings of the Bible to guide your actions and reactions. Practical advice from the Bible can help guide this journey.

Balancing Crushes and Faith

Having a crush is not inherently sinful—it’s a natural human experience. However, it’s crucial to ensure that these feelings do not lead us down a path away from our faith.

We must approach crushes with a grounded perspective, aligning our feelings with God’s word, and examining our hearts regularly. This balance can be achieved by keeping God at the forefront of our thoughts and actions.

Practical Advice from the Bible

Scripture is brimming with practical advice about managing emotions and relationships. As believers, we’re called to pursue purity, self-control, and love. As such, it’s crucial to differentiate between a God-honouring attraction and a worldly, desire-based crush.

Pursuing a biblical perspective and behavior towards crushes are proof of obedience, maturity, and growth in faith.

The Role of Prayer in Dealing with Crushes

Finally, it’s important to underscore the power and necessity of prayer in dealing with crushes, as with any other aspect of life.

Praying for Guidance

Prayer is one of the most powerful tools given to us by God. It is through prayer that we can seek God’s wisdom, clarity, and peace in times of emotional turmoil.

Praying for guidance helps us align our feelings with God’s will, leading to healthier and more God-honouring inter-personal relationships.

Using Prayer to Navigate Feelings

Additionally, prayer can be a potent means to navigate the influx of feelings that come with having a crush. By bringing these feelings before God, we can find peace, understanding, and direction amidst the chaos.

Ultimately, dealing with crushes in a Christian way is about using your faith as your compass, steering you to honor God with your feelings, thoughts, and actions.


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